Welcome Back To Our Lives, Crystal Pepsi!
What an amazing year 1992 was, right? Zack & Jesse were Prince Charming and Snow White, and had to kiss, but it felt weird because they had been friends forever and Zack was with Kelly, and Jesse was with Slater. Slater's old girlfriend from Germany transferred in, and they had unresolved feelings for each other, even though he was with Jesse, and she liked Zack (who had broken up with Kelly at this point). Then Slater's sister showed up, and Zack started dating her, too! Tori was there, Kelly & Jesse disappeared for a while, and then Mr. Belding's wife gave birth in an elevator after an earthquake. And it was the last year the Summer and Winter Olympics were held in the same year. I guess that's important to mention, too, probably.
But most importantly was the release of one of my favorite sodas as a kid, Crystal Pepsi. See... up until 1992, our Pepsi had been the traditional Pepsi color. PepsiCo decided enough was enough. Pepsi needed to be clearer than the results of Screech's Love Testing Machine. In a bold new strategy, they released a cola... that was clear.
People didn't know what to think. Clear sodas were lemon-lime. They weren't cola! This was going to cause chaos, like when Zack organized then resolved a teacher's strike to save his ski trip AND the Academic Bowl.
For two full years, we embraced Crystal Pepsi. But it was too good for us. We couldn't handle it, and Crystal Pepsi had to be shelved alongside Screech's Spaghetti Sauce. It's been 24 long years since we could last see through our Pepsis. But the wait is over.
It's 2016. Crystal Pepsi no longer as to suffer being misunderstood and ahead of its time. Its time is now, and we can't see it. Because it's clear. Come August 8, we'll be able to purchase this tasty and refreshing beverage in a store near us. You'll be second in line to get it, staring at the back of my head while I buy a case, for I shall be first in line. Starting July 7th, you can play "The Crystal Pepsi Trail" a version of Oregon Trail, to tide you over until you can finally get the Crystal Pepsi you so desire.
Now if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go listen to Sammy Hagar era Van Halen's "Right Now" on repeat for the next 6 weeks.