NBCNews.com reported yesterday that dolphins appear to do non-linear math.  I don't know about you, but not only do I not do non-linear math.  I'm not sure exactly what non-linear math is.  That made us think (a rare happening).  How many other animals are smarter than KICK radio personalities.  As it turns out, the answer is "a lot".

From that NBCNews.com article:

The math involved is complex. Essentially it relies upon sending out pulses that vary in amplitude. The first may have a value of 1, while the second is one-third that amplitude.

"So, provided the dolphin remembers what the ratios of the two pulses were, and can multiply the second echo by that and add the echoes together, it can make the fish 'visible' to its sonar," Leighton told Discovery News. "This is detection enhancement."

Huh?  I repeat.  Huh?!?

Check out this parrot who did a record twenty tricks in two minutes.  The KICK-FM staff has been unable to recite the alphabet (correctly) in under two minutes.

If you have ever put food on a plate in front of a KICK-FM airhead, you know that we go into an uncontrollable feeding rage.  This Cocker Spaniel actually waits until it's given permission to eat...again, smarter than a KICK-FM DJ.

And, although we have leg hair that looks similar to this horse, the KICK-FM airstaff has yet to successfully (in this order) been able to bow, sit down and say yes and no.

You might think (incorrectly) that we would be smarter than a ferret at least.  Wrong.  Last time we were asked to be part of a Civil War reenactment, we made everyone mad when we refused to play dead...which this ferret does with no trouble.

Have we thanked you lately for putting up with us?  If not, I'll do that now.  Thanks.